The problem with Trying...

try (tr)
1. To make an effort to do or accomplish (something); attempt:

Trying implies that failure is an option, that a half hearted attempt at an unrealistic goal, ending in failure is acceptable and grounds to give up and never "try" again.

I've tried dieting, I've tried following a race training program, I've tried really hard at a number of things, and you know what...I think I "try" too hard.

I was thinking about this as I was running this morning. The plan was to run 4 miles, which I did. I wanted to try to beat my pace from my last run. I'm always thinking like that, more, faster, better, stronger. I rarely appreciate the now, I'm always looking to the future. So, I set my goals and started running, by the time I had completed the 4 miles I was beat and uncertain if I should be happy or not. The run felt slow and I seemed to take too many walking breaks. Dark thoughts and doubts loomed in my mind.... I'm so unhealthy... I'm so slow...I'll never get any better. Once I hooked the ipod up to the computer to compare my times, I realized that this had actually been one of my faster runs and something to be proud over...not depressed by. That's the problem with me and trying...

1. I set unattainable goals
2. Attempting to achieve the goal is Uncomfortable/ Dissatisfying
3. I feel weak and inadequate
4. That lowers my confidence
5. I become defeated and quit.

It's the same pattern every time, apply this pattern to my diet now.

1. I set an unrealistic weight loss goal
2. Attempting to achieve the goal is Uncomfortable/ Dissatisfying
3. I feel weak and inadequate
4. That lowers my confidence
5. I become defeated and quit.


That pattern is really destructive, and is probably the reason why I have gained and lost the same 50 pounds over and over again. Today I noticed this my running, as I thought of ChiRunning and maintaining good form, my running seemed more natural and unforced, whereas, when my mind wandered back to personal bests and good pace times I became more and more...stressed, my shoulders tightened, my elbows clenched, my hands became fists, I got tired and had to walk. It was a vicious cycle but a great metaphor for trying too hard.
When I try hard, I'm unhappy. When I'm unhappy, I eat. I'll never achieve lasting weight loss or true healthiness by living under these extremes. I've got to learn to relax and take what comes naturally. That isn't to say that I should be lazy, but there is a BIG difference between putting solid effort into something, and being masochistic.

"Do, or do not. There is no try." ~Yoda